Author: keef

I love X-Entertainment.

Read that kids. And cry laughing. And remembering. And laughing.

pretzlboy02: man, nobody is up for the quickest roadtrip of all time to the greatest city of all time

TheRobotMonkey: when I dropped out of college, Pete, I sacrificed certain freedoms

TheRobotMonkey: one of those being no responsibilities

pretzlboy02: that freedom will return someday

TheRobotMonkey: yes, but I won’t be driving anywhere when I’m dead

I’m gonna take a shower and eat some english muffins.

maybe then I’ll find inspiration.

Crow2k: talk to you later, bro

Crow2k: WOOOOO

TheRobotMonkey: later Barb

TheRobotMonkey: WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

TheRobotMonkey: IOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOWA CITY!

Crow2k: BILL BRAAAAAAAAADSKI!

Crow2k: WOOOO!

TheRobotMonkey: BEEEEEEEEEEEEER!

Crow2k: HAWKEYEEEEEEES!

TheRobotMonkey: HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEROIN!

Crow2k: FOOOOOOOOTBAAAAAAAAAL!

TheRobotMonkey: POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORN!

Crow2k: DAAAATE RAAAAPE!

TheRobotMonkey: GHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHB!

Crow2k: oh god, i am going to wet my pants!

TheRobotMonkey: (does that even work?)

Crow2k: good bye!

TheRobotMonkey: bye

For some reason I keep dressing like a Lumberjack.

Somebody fedex me an axe.

[BROKEN IMAGE]

A Prayer To God- Shellac

To the one true God above:
here is my prayer –
not the first you’ve heard, but the first I wrote.
(not the first, but the others were a long time ago).
There are two people here, and I want you to kill them.
Her – she can go quietly, by disease or a blow
to the base of her neck,
where her necklaces close,
where her garments come together,
where I used to lay my face,
That’s where you oughta kill her,
in that particular place.
Him – just fucking kill him, I don’t care if it hurts.
Yes I do, I want it to,
fucking kill him but first
make him cry like a woman,
(no particular woman),
let him hold out, hold back
(someone or other might come and fucking kill him).
Fucking kill him.
Kill him already, kill him.
Fucking kill him,
fucking kill him,
Kill him already, kill him,
Just fucking kill him!
Fucking kill him!
Fucking kill him!
Fucking kill him!
Just fucking kill him!
Amen.

stewymcstewstew: if i die i want it to be in action, like saving a kid, or beating my wife

TheRobotMonkey: not masturbating like you spend the 0ther 98% of your life?

stewymcstewstew: exactly

stewymcstewstew: that would be really embarrassing

Also I’m freezing and the house is a comfortable 70 degrees.

Goddamn.

Tonight I’m going to get rocked like a hurricane and drunk like a poet on payday.

And it is payday.

Life would be so much easier if I could just get this monkey off my back.

His name is Chim-Chim.

I stole him from an organ grinder.