I keep trying to forget. I keep trying not to hold on.
But I can’t.
And I won’t.
Not yet.
I’m a mess of contradictions
And I hate myself sometimes.
This is one of those.
No signals.
No signs.
No maps.
No stars guiding my path.
What the am I supposed to do?
How am I supposed to feel?
To act?
To talk?
What do you want to hear?
Can you at least tell me?
Anticipation makes my head hurt.
I got drunk last night trying not to think.
It didn’t work.
So I was drunk and thinking.
I thought about you.
I thought about me.
I thought about drinking more.
So I drank more.
And I thought more.
And here I am again.
Still thinking.
Still drinking.
I won’t be going anywhere soon.