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Meh

Sometimes we fuck up.

Sometimes we aren’t equipped to deal with situations that we throw ourselves into.

Sometimes we make mistakes that we can’t go back on.

Sometimes we wish things had never happened.

Sometimes, no matter how hard we try, we know we can’t change a fucking thing and still for some reason cling onto our excuses and bullshit reasons.

I hate myself sometimes. A lot.

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everything is close captioned

I’ve just done something that was both the right thing to do, and the wrong thing to do at the sametime.

I don’t even know what to say. Life is funny like that. It’s like a joke that no one laughs at, yet everyone gets all too well.

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If you cast off your doubt, then your lips would answer for you

Kathy With A K’S Song-Bright Eyes

Love is real
It is not just in novels or the movies
It is fact
And it is standing here right in front of you
So if you open your eyes, oh what a sweet discovery
There is hope, and there is joy, and there is acceptance
So now let all of the light that collects on your plants
Keep you warm, make you smile
And I will be there with this pen in my hand
To record all the while
You’ll be laughing so loud that the house would shake with sound
And everything will be as new as the day it was found
Love is real
It is not just in long distance commercials
Or something that you thought you felt back in high school
So I will turn black and white
Become that horoscope you’re reading
It predicts something good is on its way
Oh, and then I will send you the world green and blue
In a box through the mail
You can open it up, hold it right in your hand
And be glad that it’s there
And be glad that you’re there
You can feel all the knots in your stomach start to untie
And suddenly it’s not so hard to say you’re all right
Love is real
It is not just in poetry and stories
It is truth, and it will follow you
Everywhere you go from now on
So if you’d just cast off your doubt
Then your lips would answer for you
Oh my darling, when you smile, it is like a song
And I can hear it now

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Ahhhhh, life is good.

WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING
WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING

I’m about to sound like a fucking hippy

WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING
WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING WARNING

Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

So I forgot how much I actually like the world. Ah, don’t stop reading there. Keep going, it’s ok. I went for a walk tonight.

I’ve had a lot of stuff going on lately and today I was very stressed out. I have this Classical and Biblical Lit course I’m taking that is causing me a lot of un-needed stress. The professor doesn’t ever really lecture on the stuff he tests over, he just kind of rehashes the reading. Most people in that class have C’s or Lower. It really sucks. I really hate it.

So tonight, I was really antsy and fed up and needed to get out. So I went for a nice long walk and ended up down by the IMU on the riverside. There’s this spot down by the dock down there that I would sit at last year and look at the stars on. It was my spot. If I got pissed at my room mate or just needed to blow off steam, I’d go sit down there and do it. I really loved that little spot. I’ve only been down there a couple times this year. Anyway, I sat down there at a quarter after nine, just relaxed, stretched out, looked at the cloudy night sky, the river, everything around it, and thought a whole lot.

I think I’d make a good hermit. I decided this tonight. I’m not really sure why I’m here. I have no real clue what I want to do with my life. If I could just feel as free and comfortable as I did tonight though, I’d take that chance up in a minute.

I think all of us do this to some extent (I know I do all the time), when we forget to enjoy the moment and are constantly thinking 3 days ahead, a week ahead, a year ahead, etc. The moment is a nice thing. But it goes quickly, and you gotta enjoy it. Like that Beatles song said “You were always waiting for that moment to arrive”. You can’t look to far ahead and ignore the present.

I had a really wonderful night after all. And that’s all I gotta say now.

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The Forgotten Chodes

Everybody needs a good laugh. That is why I am posting a link to this horrible band from my hometown’s webpage.

They want to be AFI or the Misfits. They do a piss poor job at it.

    THE FORGOTTEN TOOLS…excuse me SOULS

For extra laughs read the lyrics page. Oh holy shit. So bad. So bad.

Here’s a sample:

We’re gonna rip your pain. Rub against the grain. And when it’s over. Here we come around again.

Last I checked, not only where those horrible rhymes, but the phrase “rip your pain” makes no damned sense.

Enjoy the laugh.

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Bloop.

Hmmmmm… what is new in this boy’s life?

Not fucking much, that’s what. But oh well. The soundtrack for today has been a cd of my favorite Bright Eyes songs. It started out as a cd I made for a friend, but it ended up that I liked it so much I made one for me. Most of the Bright Eyes stuff I have is on vinyl anyways, so I’m in need of cd’s that I can listen to at night.

Tonight: heading over to the Potata for the show and to give Brian a haircut. That’s right. I am now living out my childhood fantasy of being a Barber. Goodthing I’ve had a couple years of practice on myself.

Anything else? Nay, I say. Nay motherfucker. I’m sorry.